Oooh - don't get me started, Rosie Perez

I had the TV on for background noise last night as I checked e-mail, etc. Unfortunately, Entertainment Tonight was on - normally, I would have changed the channel, because ET, Mary Hart, and everyone associated with that show are really grossly mistaken about how much the average American is interested in their "Entertainment News" items. Ever noticed how, after most of the stories, Mary or her male counterpart will "ad lib" to the other one something along the lines of "and we all can't wait to see how that turns out!!" - Well, yeah, actually, most of us don't give a shit.

But I digress. And I couldn't find the remote.

Last night, ET kept "teasing" this "top story" about Rosie Perez, and some injury she allegedly suffered on the set of Law & Order, SVU, (*waves @ Chris Meloni*) and the horrible nightmare she is now enduring. Each tease made it sound more and more dreadful; in fact, I believe the words "wheelchair-bound", "confined to a wheelchair," and "horrific" may have even been used.

So finally the story starts, and you see Rosie being pushed, in a wheelchair, with dozens of people behind her, and many in front of her, flashbulbs lighting up the interview. And it's a poor poor pitiful Rosie story - how she was doing her own stunt on the show, and got shaken too hard, and suffered:
"2 slipped discs, 1 bulging disc, 3 strained ligaments, and a severe pinched nerve".

And she's wearing some designer hard cervical collar to protect her neck, and frailly flailing her arms around, until the big reveal: she opens up her black and white designer cervical collar to reveal the "HORRIFIC SCAR" that she is afraid will end her career. Well that, and the fact that she may never DANCE again (when was the last time she had to dance in a role? And ever heard of make-up?)

So then she tells about the dreadful surgery, and the horrific scar ("but it will heal...."), and how she is under strict doctor's orders NOT to walk more than 2-3 blocks a day; hence the wheelchair. And BTW: "confined to a wheelchair" & "wheelchair-bound" mean you can't get out of the wheelchair. Period. It doesn't mean you get pushed around in it for photo-ops, and then get out to walk your "2-3 blocks a day."

Rosie's "Horrific" scar

Now here are SOME of my beefs with the above:

1) There is no such thing as a "slipped disc". Period. That is a layman's term for I don't know what. But it doesn't exist, medically.

2) I had the exact same surgery on 6/24/10.  Or really, I suspect, not the exact same, because I actually had 2 ruptured discs, 1 of which had acutely herniated, causing a large disc fragment to become embedded in the nerve roots supplying my Left arm, with associated severe pain and loss of strength in my left arm and hand. No strained ligaments that I know of, though. Whew!

3) I was discharged from the hospital less than 24 hours after my surgery, and the only wheelchair involved was the one they mandate carry you from your room to your ride. My doctor had released me to full, normal activity that morning, except I was to avoid lifting over 15 lbs, and I was NOT to do any overhead work. But walking - quite fine with him, as long as I felt up to it. And as a small business owner, I was back to work full time on 6/27/10 -- I was on pain medicine, and I got awfully tired, but you do what you have to do.

4) Rosie's surgery was, in my educated* opinion, well before 6/25/10 - and I am basing this on my professional* observation of the "horrific" scar she unveiled on ET last night - it looks a hell of a lot better than the way mine looked on 7/12 when the doctor took off the last of my steristrips - mine is STILL considerably swollen, both on the outside and the inside (per X-ray), and I still have no audible voice (a rare complication from the amount of scar tissue the doctor had to scrape away during surgery.)

My swollen, formerly swan-like neck - red from the allergic reaction to the dressing, 21 days post-op.

So I am baffled as to Rosie's wheelchair, and non-plussed by her "horrific" scar - and suspect this is all part of some impending lawsuit against SVU. Or just some badly needed publicity for her sagging career. My opinion, of course.

*Yes, I have a professional degree that allows me to formulate educated medical opinions.