I love Spring. Really. I do.
Except for the first full week in April.
Because the first full week in April is Masters Week, and I hate Masters Week.
It's Masters Time again, and everything here in the CSRA (that's the Central Savannah River Area, to you uniniatiateds) is turned upside down to accomodate everything Masters.
Normally, living "across the River" as I do (in South Carolina), I could mark the passage of this week with just a few grimaces, as some of my favorite TV shows are pre-empted for the mandatory Masters Updates that our local CBS affiliate feels obliged to provide every evening during Prime Time. And there is nothing on the local news except golf, golf, and more golf. And late night programming is all pre-empted too, for Masters Highlights, on all networks. Of course, I also have to remember not to try to go out to eat, because all the local restaurants are vastly overbooked, plus they have jacked up their rates for this week only. And last but not least, at all costs, avoid going anywhere near Augusta.
But this year is different, because I am working at a shop in Augusta that is located on Washington Road. Guess what else is on Washington Road? Augusta National Golf Course - and just 1.5 miles away.
I've been to Augusta National during Masters before, and it is gorgeous, but that is NOT the Masters I am experiencing this week.
Except for the first full week in April.
Because the first full week in April is Masters Week, and I hate Masters Week.
It's Masters Time again, and everything here in the CSRA (that's the Central Savannah River Area, to you uniniatiateds) is turned upside down to accomodate everything Masters.
Normally, living "across the River" as I do (in South Carolina), I could mark the passage of this week with just a few grimaces, as some of my favorite TV shows are pre-empted for the mandatory Masters Updates that our local CBS affiliate feels obliged to provide every evening during Prime Time. And there is nothing on the local news except golf, golf, and more golf. And late night programming is all pre-empted too, for Masters Highlights, on all networks. Of course, I also have to remember not to try to go out to eat, because all the local restaurants are vastly overbooked, plus they have jacked up their rates for this week only. And last but not least, at all costs, avoid going anywhere near Augusta.
But this year is different, because I am working at a shop in Augusta that is located on Washington Road. Guess what else is on Washington Road? Augusta National Golf Course - and just 1.5 miles away.
I've been to Augusta National during Masters before, and it is gorgeous, but that is NOT the Masters I am experiencing this week.
Breaking all my own rules, I am driving toward Augusta on I-20, and exiting on Riverwatch Parkway, crossing over to Washington Road on Stevens Creek Parkway in an attempt to use the light at Stevens Creek and Washington Rd to get into Dunkin Donuts for my morning bagel and coffee, as I do every morning. Only to find it takes 35 minutes to go 50 yards through the light at that intersection, because the golf-bound traffic on Washington Road feels it is perfectly OK to block the intersection when the light turns red. And the icing on this cake is the Richmond County Sheriff sitting in his cruiser at the BP station watching this, but making no attempt to keep that intersection clear.
So, I have done this 3 mornings so far this week, and it has taken longer and longer each morning. I anticipate it will only get worse as the tournament progresses this week.
I cannot wait until Masters is over.
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